the crushing weight of sin

A Psalm of David, for the memorial offering.
1 O Lord, rebuke me not in Your anger,
nor discipline me in Your wrath!
2 For Your arrows have sunk into me,
and Your hand has come down on me.

3 There is no soundness in my flesh
because of Your indignation;
there is no health in my bones
because of my sin.
4 For my iniquities have gone over my head;
like a heavy burden, they are too heavy for me.

5 My wounds stink and fester
because of my foolishness,
6 I am utterly bowed down and prostrate;
all the day I go about mourning.
7 For my sides are filled with burning,
and there is no soundness in my flesh.
8 I am feeble and crushed;
I groan because of the tumult of my heart.

9 O Lord, all my longing is before You;
my sighing is not hidden from You.
10 My heart throbs; my strength fails me,
and the light of my eyes—it also has gone from me.
11 My friends and companions stand aloof from my plague,
and my nearest kin stand far off.

12 Those who seek my life lay their snares;
those who seek my hurt speak of ruin
and meditate treachery all day long.

13 But I am like a deaf man; I do not hear,
like a mute man who does not open his mouth.
14 I have become like a man who does not hear,
and in whose mouth are no rebukes.

15 But for You, O Lord, do I wait;
it is You, O Lord my God, who will answer.
16 For I said, “Only let them not rejoice over me,
who boast against me when my foot slips!”

17 For I am ready to fall,
and my pain is ever before me.
18 I confess my iniquity;
I am sorry for my sin.
19 But my foes are vigorous, they are mighty,
and many are those who hate me wrongfully.
20 Those who render me evil for good
accuse me because I follow after good.

21 Do not forsake me, O Lord!
O my God, be not far from me!
22 Make haste to help me,
O Lord, my salvation!

- Psalm 38

This is a piercing psalm.  As I read this psalm (over and over) I was pierced by the anguish in the psalmist heart over his own sin.  I found myself wondering if I ever feel this same type of anguish over my sin.  Notice the plea of the first two stanzas:

“O Lord, rebuke me not in Your anger, nor discipline me in Your wrath! For Your arrows have sunk into me, and Your hand has come down on me. There is no soundness in my flesh because of Your indignation; there is no health in my bones because of my sin.” (1-3)

The psalmist is pleading with the Lord to remove His anger.  He understands the gravity of His sin and what it means.  Often times I feel as though sin is much less serious to us than it was in the patriarch’s of old.  Yes, we have been bought with the blood of Christ and our sin is covered by that blood but when we sin we need to experience the same grief that the psalmist does over it.  For sin disrupts our intimate fellowship with our God and that should grieve us in the same way that it does David.  Listen to his grief:

” My wounds stink and fester because of my foolishness, I am utterly bowed down and prostrate; all the day I go about mourning. For my sides are filled with burning, and there is no soundness in my flesh. I am feeble and crushed; I groan because of the tumult of my heart.” (5-8)

He is “utterly bowed down and prostrate” and goes about mourning “all day.” His view of his sin is real and grievous. He longs for the day when he is reconciled to the Lord.  He realizes the full effect of his sin and mourns over it.  Our sin should be no less grievous to us.  We have been given so much in Christ and our sin should devastate us.  Granted, we should always lean on the grace of Christ, but our sin should pierce our hearts and leave us prostrate before a holy God seeking repentance.  And just like David our confidence should be in the Lord’s answer:

” O Lord, all my longing is before You; my sighing is not hidden from You” (9) ”But for You, O Lord, do I wait; it is You, O Lord my God, who will answer.” (15) “Do not forsake me, O Lord! O my God, be not far from me! Make haste to help me, O Lord, my salvation!” (21-22)

David closes this psalm by speaking of how even his closes friends have deserted him in his time of need.  But this turmoil does not devastate him because he knows the Lord hears his voice and it is the Lord that he waits for.  Then he cries out for the Lord to make haste and come to him.  What a beautiful psalm of repentance! May we all grieve over our sin in the same way David does here and may we seek the Lord only for relief. 

a side challenge

When you read a psalm like this that has so much passion and emotion in it, it is easy to just read it.  I challenge you to think of the emotion behind a passage when reading it.  Try to read the psalm or passage of scripture with the desire to know the emotions of the writer.  Then read the passage with the passion that is behind it.  Let the scripture become real to you as you read. 

- one who grieves over his sin